There are some things I don't know,
Some things I think will tear me apart if I know them, and some things I think will tear me apart unless I know them ...
It's taken me a while, but I have learnt, it's not what I don't know that matters.
It's what I do know...
I do know:
*** That my real friends are always there... no matter what. No matter how far they have to travel to be by my side when I need them, those true friends are the ones who count. They are the family who you get to choose. The ones who laugh with you, cry with you, pick you up, brush you down, and tell you not to go out in that ridiculous top! These are the friends who shape your life and love having you around, all the rest are just imprints in the sand that get washed away with the tide.
***How I deserve, and want to be treated. Every one has heartache at some point in their life, (and if you don't you are one of the lucky few) but it's what helps us learn about not only ourselves, but what we want from the lives we have to live. If everything was easy it would never need to be fixed, it would never be broken or falling apart, and we would never know the real strength that every single one of us has!
***What I like. I know that it doesn't matter whether you like the same as me or the complete opposite, that's okay. Because everyone is not meant to like exactly the same colour, or flower, or food or music. I do not need to be told what I should or should not like, as I have grown to know for myself... Thank you very much. And like my Mum and Dad, and Auntie Mini have always said, when you have found that one person, that best friend who loves you for exactly who you are, your little faults become obsolete, and the love that you have for one another keeps you together. He or she will become the half that keeps you afloat when your drowning and everybody struggles to swim through life at some point.
***The most important thing to me is family, and one day I will have my own, who depend on me. But for the unforeseeable future, I rely on mine. Each and every one of them! The parents who guide me through life, help me make the right choices and despite the wrong choices love me whole-heartedly. The Brother, who despite the terror years, has grown up to be one of the only men I truly trust and respect. The Grandparents who get left to pick up the pieces, give out hugs, offer tea and a safe haven away from the frantic real world. Who have a lot to say and a whole lot of experience to back it up. The Aunt and Uncle who are mediators, the shoulder to cry on, the ones to enjoy time with away from the stress, that sometimes gets overwhelming at home... The cousin who chooses to listen and be your friend, who will always be your wingman and you will always be hers. The one that doesn't judge, just stands by you and makes you smile.... No one can replace these people, and if I could choose my own I would choose the exact same ones, as the ones I already have!
Even when we feel down we need to consider what we have... we could be much worse off, no matter how awful everything feels at the time. We need to remember that family will always be there, and are the ones we turn to in times of real need, but we also need to stand on our own two feet to learn for ourselves.
***What I want out of life... and no matter how long it takes I will get it... and I will be smiling 99.99% of the time.
I also know that my opinion will not matter to everyone, but that this is out of my control. And that some peoples opinions will not matter to me but they will voice them anyway!! This is the way of the world. If we can hold on to what we know and not panic about what we don't know and can't control, happiness is easier to find in life!
If it wasn't for the tears we wouldn't know how to smile... If it wasn't for the pain we wouldn't know happiness... and if it wasn't for the heart ache we wouldn't know love.